Mental Wellness – MD Update

The Argument Antidote

October 1, 2020October 19, 2020 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC actual behavior, argument antidote, behavior, body language, champion of relationship, chance, counterintuitive notion, Dr. John Gottman, endless struggle, gather dust, good chance, Gottman, Gottman 's research, Hal, insufficient condition, intimate personal relationship, John Gottman, love lab, love part, major marital conflict, majority of marital conflict, marital conflict, marriage therapy, master of relationship, mental closet, mundane annoyance, northern California home, partner, partner 's commitment, partner 's willingness, perpetual category, raw footage data means, real couple, real live couple, relationship 's good, relationship process, relationship superpower, repellent, resentment, resentment repellent, science of relationship, sense of the delicate balance, Sidra, Sidra 's work, Sidra stone, sink feel, skill, solution-focused, solution-focused communication skill, solution-focused process, solution-focused skill, therapist, tone of voice, unadorned translation, week-long workshop, wonder relationship

“There’s absolutely no hope for this relationship,” I thought to myself, with a sinking feeling. It was my first time

Mental Wellness

Suicidal Thoughts? They’re Not a Good Predictor of Suicide

August 1, 2020October 19, 2020 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC area of the brain, big risk factor, brain, client, client 's shoe, client stop, client stop think suicidal thought, clinician, constricted think, counselor-client, counselor-client relationship, counterintuitive part, crisis counselor, crucial connection, drown person, good clinical train, good predictor of a suicide attempt, good predictor of suicide, helpful person, hotline, inner critic, internal negotiation, judgment, Kentucky right, life jacket, live buffer, local crisis counselor, local suicide hotline, major national public health issue, Marsha Linehan, mental constriction, Muzak queue, near-critical, near-critical car accident, normal human suffer, option, person contemplate suicide, powerful protective factor, problem-solving impairment, psychologist call, psychology nerd, rational thought, resourceful lady, safety plan, severe mental strain, Sidra stone, standard record, start function, suicide, suicide assessment, suicide attempt, suicide hotline, surreal minute, surreal minute of easy listen music, texted help

Thinking about suicide is not a very good predictor of a suicide attempt. Thinking about suicide isn’t even one of

Mental Wellness

The Upside of a Self-Absorbed Mother

May 1, 2020September 4, 2020 Jan Anderson able therapist, antisocial tendency, blank inside, clever workaround, coat-hanger, disadvantage of a mother, egocentric stage, egocentric stage of development, fashion history, fat chance, hallmark card section, lovely reply, mini-dress, mother 's day, mother example, nice letter, painful period, pant, pant prohibition, pantsuit, phony card, pretty card, pretty serious damage, prevail social norm, self-absorbed mother, short mini-dress, station of life, sweet gift, therapist, upside of a Self-Absorbed mother, utter frustration, well-meaning adult

Along with all the downsides, I consider myself fortunate to have grown up with a self-absorbed mother. (My father was,

Mental Wellness

Both/And Thinking Makes You Smarter and More Emotionally Intelligent

March 1, 2020June 1, 2020 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC #MeToo, air-tight container type, air-tight container type of brain, big container, cognitive disarray, container, cool part, discomfort of hold opposite, door number three, emotional receptivity, expanded think, Hal, hellish state, jungian-based, jungian-based skill, opposite, organizational meltdown, outpour of unity, over-accentuate, overt sign of hatred, personal recipient, radical acceptance, receptivity, sense of strength, Sidra, Sidra stone, tension of the opposite, three thousand, three thousand mile drive, white think mind, zen koan

Right after 9/11, my mentors, Drs. Hal and Sidra Stone wrote about their decision to make the three thousand mile

Mental Wellness

It Starts with a Secret

February 1, 2020April 2, 2020 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC anatomy of a breakup, chance, Diane Vaughn, end of the relationship seesaw, essential start point, essential start point of a felt connection, experiential learn, felt, felt connection, good chance, good table manner, halfway home, hard thing, let 's start, let 's talk, life-altering decision, necessary pain, new idea, No-Win, No-Win strategy, one hundred % guarantee, partner, partner 's affection, person share, quiet recess, relationship go, relationship seesaw, sane possible position, semi-empty, semi-empty house, skill, strategy, strategy no-win, strategy spiral, Sure-Fire, Sure-Fire way, take birth control pill, total transparency, turn away moment, ultimate victim position, undisclosed decision, unnecessary strife, value of good table manner, victim position, volatile guy, vulnerable thing, weird part

It starts with a secret— a decision you make in the quiet recesses of your own mind. This decision will

Mental Wellness

Are There Good Reasons for Bad Feelings?

November 1, 2019February 21, 2020 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC American 15-44, American 15-44 year, anxiety, bad feel, brain, brain influence mood, brain sound, chemical imbalance, committed love relationship, costly thing, crucial foundation, Darwinian, depression, depression center, depression research, disorder, evolutionary medicine, evolutionary psychiatry, founder of evolutionary medicine, frontier of evolutionary psychiatry, funny noise, good reason, goodness, health service administration, image001 photo, image002 photo, intolerable side effect, Jesse Wright, lead cause of disability, meaningful happy life, mental health service administration, mental health treatment, mindless selection, mood, mood disorder, mood mechanism, moodostat, naïve Darwinian, Nesse, ordinary Darwinian, ordinary psychiatrist, origin of mood, photo, pretty good way, psychiatry, Randolph Nesse, selfish competition, stop treat symptom, stop view symptom, symptom, united state 's investment, UofL, UofL depression center conference, UOFL Randolph Nesse, usual stuff

“Why does depression exist at all?” “Why are mental disorders so confusing?” I wasn’t expecting these types of questions from

Mental Wellness

The Divorce Dilemma

October 1, 2019December 9, 2019 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC challenge decision, copy of crazy time, couple experience marital problem, death of the spouse, dimension of life happiness, divorce, divorce dilemma, divorce workshop, exquisite vulnerability, family challenge, good divorce, happiness, kid, level of stuckness, life event, life happiness, marital strife, new therapist, OR go, parent stay, partner, perfectly-calibrated, perfectly-calibrated parent, place of exquisite vulnerability, recognized divorce workshop, spouse, stressful life event, therapist, too-lofty, too-lofty observation, unhappiness, unhappy marriage

While I was going through my messy divorce, I was stunned to run across a book called The Good Divorce.

Mental Wellness

The Problem with Intimacy

September 1, 2019October 28, 2019 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC alcohol consumption, being benefit, closeness, cognitive distortion, cultural tendency, dangerous little bugger, degree of distance, distortion, distressed mother, emotional risk, empower way, feel safe, golf, good chance of intimacy, good character trait, handy way, herd, herd animal, high risk, human being benefit, human condition, intimacy, lesson, like herd animal, lone wolf, lone wolf mentality, lonely mother, meaningful connection, mentality, new thought structure, obesity, painful awareness, reality, reality of the human condition, relationship quicksand, skill, skill memory, tactics, think error, timeworn tactics, universal law, universal law of relationship, vulnerability, weak-minded individual, wolf, wolf mentality

“We’re not close.” That was the elegantly simple way a distressed mother tearfully described her relationships with her grown children.

Mental Wellness

Estranged from Your Adult Child: The Last Thing You Ever Expected

June 1, 2019September 4, 2019 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC adult child, alienation of divorced parent, child blame, child-centered family, childless member, childless member of society remark, college-aged son, daughter-in-law, dependent parent, Elizabeth Vagnoni, endless heartache, estrangement, estrangement stem, family-oriented time, family-oriented time of year approach, feel of profound vulnerability, guilt, happy life, heartache, Indian court system, Joshua Coleman, kid, long-term conflict, loyalty conflict, mental illness, mother 's befuddlement, Mr. Samuel, parent advice, parent-centered, Parent-Child, Parent-Child estrangement, primal bond, professional help, profound vulnerability, quick-fix solution, Raphael Samuel, Raphael Samuel of Mumbai, refuse contact, relationship repair, remorse, San Francisco psychologist, serious life situation, six-session, six-session internet seminar, society remark, son-, son-in-law, successful adulthood, temperamental mismatch, time of heartache, twenty-seven-year-old, unanticipated place, Vagnoni, well-meaning parent, year approach

As holidays, birthdays and other family-oriented times of year approach, it’s a time of heartache for parents whose adult children

Mental Wellness

How to Make Peace with Your Parents — And Just About Anybody Else

May 1, 2019June 21, 2019 Jan Anderson, PSYD, LPCC accusatory suffer, bad feel, Bibliotherapy, case of abuse, character draw, emotional baggage, emotional recovery, emotional wound, endless loop of ruminate, enjoy movie, evidence-based recovery method, experience part fit, forgiveness, forgiveness process, good life, hoped-for relationship, ill-tempered meanness, insufficient condition, loss of the hoped-for relationship, mother 's decades-long, mother 's hostility, near-effortless, near-effortless opportunity, painful reality, parent 's hurtful behavior, recovery, recovery look, resilience, set consequence, sheer desperation, sincere-but-delusional, sincere-but-delusional pretend, surprise benefit, therapy, victim mentality, write therapy, Wynona Judd

“It’s always something or your mother,” as Wynona Judd is fond of saying. I guess she should know. She and

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